The river wild

3 10 2004

Preliminary Report by Dr. Killingsworth
NOODLE, best cialis malady ID: 5143287

Session 1:
Location: Subject’s apartment
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
Attendees: Noodle (test subject), Amelia Crook (old friend)

9:30 PM
Outside influence, Miss Crook, is slated to arrive from London at any moment. No sign. Test subject Noodle appears calm and aloof, and cracks open a beer with what appears to be joyous aplomb. Apartment is rudely clean. Highly suspect. Her constant examination of her appearance in the chrome kitchen bench top remains unexplained. This level of primping is highly unusual for a subject who barely remembers to comb her hair before leaving the apartment.

Later, 12:30 AM
Crook still absent. Subject Noodle’s form is eerily contained as she maintains a compact and almost rigid posture on the sofa. Yet a clear scent of simmering fear (or perhaps agitation?), is sauntering off her like a tsunami. Outward appearances with this subject are often a cunning subterfuge—crafty masks for hiding real feelings of doubt. It should be noted in the file that this subject bears all the classic signs of advanced Keepitinsideaphelia. Her ‘about to explode at any moment’ aura can be quite…smothering and pre-volcanic in nature.

Subject speaks to herself frequently while maintaining eye contact with the final minutes of the program hosted by TV impresario, David Letterman. She appears engaged, yet is obviously not altogether ‘with the program’ (double meaning intended). Miss Crook is significantly late.

In a sudden burst of activity, test subject moves furniture and flips out the sofa bed. Preparatory motions are made for a hopefully satisfying REM cycle. It is evident by her muttering that she is required to report for copywriting duty the next morning, and needs to retire to bed to achieve this task.

Lights out.
Subject lies in the dark, but with eyes painfully open wide. Sighing. Fidgeting. Sighing and sighing most woefully. It is extremely irritating. I want to suffocate her with a pillow, but I will remain true to my oath. I take this opportunity to partake in a swift mind raid, since none of her mutterings are revealing her real thoughts on the matter. And I would dearly love to get this session over and done with as soon as possible, so I can jump in the Benz and toddle off to the Club for a cigar.

Mind probe projects various scenes; a plane crash; a mugging at JFK; a sad Miss Crook wandering the streets of New York lost, pressing buzzers of random buildings etc. I swear, if it’s not one thing, it’s another with this subject. Her imagination is totally out of control as she thinks of reasons for Crook’s lateness. She gets up for another glass of water (unnecessary). The pillow option is looking more attractive to me. Read the rest of this entry »

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